


The Hardest Goodbye

by grifterandthief



Series: Spring Returning [2]
Category: Hadestown - Mitchell
Genre: AU, F/M, Hadestown AU, Mom!Eurydice, She's so soft, child oc, eurydice in hadestown, ophelia tag, this is LITERALLY so sad. Literally so sad.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2019-12-23
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:21:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21922834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grifterandthief/pseuds/grifterandthief
Summary: "You won't remember me up there, but I promise I will never forget you, my love."Eurydice's last night with her daughter before sending her topside to be with Orpheus. Based on a Tumblr prompt I received.
Relationships: Eurydice/Orpheus (Hadestown)
Series: Spring Returning [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1575517
Comments: 4
Kudos: 35





	The Hardest Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> This broke my heart to write. Shout-out to Nola-Schuyler on Tumblr for this prompt and the love of Ophelia she gives me!

She imagined the first sign of spring, even in Hadestown, would bring her effervescent joy. The promise of warmth trickling through the wall, even to the workers on the line. Spring, this year, was anything but a new hello. This spring, this last night, was going to be her hardest goodbye. 

“Come here, sunshine.” Eurydice whispered, pulling her six month old out of the bath water and into her arms. “You’re all clean now, to meet your daddy tomorrow!” It struck something in her heart, as she tried her hardest not to let the sorrow seep into her voice. Positive words, Eurydice. You want your last night with your daughter to be positive. 

Eurydice held Ophelia to her shoulder, and swayed just a little as she closed the distance between the doorframe and the bed, when Ophelia’s pajamas were laid out. She tried to cherish it. Every second. The weight of her against her chest. The feeling of her head on her shoulder. The gentle weight of Ophelia in her arms. All the things she needed to commit to memory. Memories she would fight to forget. 

She laid her down to dress her, watching as she brought her firsts to her mouth. She relished in dressing her. In the way she kicked her little feet to get them out of the footed jammies. In the way she giggled as Eurydice bent down to kiss her belly when she buttoned up her onesie. In the way she grabbed onto her hand as she brushed through the dark curls on her head. 

“Come here my little love.” She cooed, cradling the baby in her arms, crawling into the bed herself. Eurydice felt a hot teardrop roll down her face before she even registered that she was crying. 

She had the bag ready. Her favorite things, a letter for Orpheus. A letter of love and forgiveness, all about their daughter. A letter of nothing but love for her daughter’s father. 

“I love you, Ophelia.” It seemed like the millionth time that night she said those words, but she wanted to ingrain it into her.  _ Your mother loved you _ . 

She pulled her heavy wool blanket around her and sighed as Ophelia nestled her face into her chest. She slid the edge of her tank top down to allow her daughter to nurse, and felt hot tears flooding down her face relentlessly. “You’re gonna fight him when he gives you a bottle, won’t you?” She stroked her cheek, reminiscent of the day she was born. 

It was impossible not to think of impending loss. Of handing her sweet baby over to Persephone. Of the painful weight of milk that won’t be drank, of arms that will be forever empty. Of a voice with no need to sing, of a heart with nothing to love. 

She stared at her, the way her eyelids fluttered as she nursed herself nearly to sleep. She wanted to brand this into her mind. Her daughter’s dark eyelashes over bright hazel eyes. Tiny fingers with perfect little nails holding her hand. She couldn’t forget this, not ever. 

“I know you won’t remember me.. You won’t remember this either.” She whispered, curling her knees up so Ophelia was encapsulated with her body. “But i’m your mama. And you won’t remember what I look like or my voice..but I love you. I love you more than springtime, my sweet girl. I love you so much. And that’s why I have to do this. And nothing will ever hurt as much as this will.” Eurydice, paused, letting her daughter switch sides briefly, before she snuggled back up in her arms. “If I would’ve known about you..I never would have come down here, you know. But then the world..it would still be dark and cold. And you get to live in a world with spring times. And with the man who made it happen.” 

Eurydice snuggled into her, her fingers drawing gentle shapes on her back. “And he’s going to love you. He walked into hell to get me. He’ll walk to the end of the world for you. I just know it. He’ll write you beautiful love songs, and he’ll hold you in those arms of his.. He’s gonna love you so much…”

This would be her last night with her for the rest of eternity. It was more painful than the time Orpheus turned around. It was more painful than starving to death. It was more painful than any loss she ever felt. 

“You’re my whole heart, Ophelia. I’m not going to have anything without you, you know.” Eurydice leaned down to kiss her head, her breath catching in her throat as Opheila wrapped her entire fist around her index finger as she did every nap and every night. She wondered how she would sleep in Orpheus’ arms the following night, if she’d cling to him like he was her world in the way she did to her mother. 

“I’ll love you always,  _ always _ my little sunshine.” Her tears littered her daughter’s pajamas, and now with a content little baby, she let herself sob. She let the pain wreck through her body like the very train that brought her to hadestown. She let her breath stop in exchange for heartbroken cries. This was it. She would have nothing left in less than 24 hours. 

Eurydice hummed just a little. She would never have a reason to sing again, as of tomorrow. A songbird without voice, a poet without a muse. It was always the same song, Orpheus’ song. She hoped that maybe, when he sang it to Ophelia, it would bring her comfort in the familiarity. It never even occurred to her that he wouldn’t sing it to their daughter- without a doubt, he would share that with her. 

She wouldn’t sleep that night. Eurydice would spend the evening soaking in every single detail of Ophelia for the last time. She would cry herself out of tears, sob until she couldn’t breath, and scream until her throat was raw. She would neve see her daughter again and her body protested. Her heart threatened to give out. What did she have left, if not Ophelia? As someone who never wanted roots, never wanted to be a mother, how would she ever have known what it was like to have her heart taken from her.

Eurydice leaned her chin on her head, kissing her forehead again and again and again. Trying to fit a lifetime of kisses into a night. Kisses for skinned knees, kisses before school, goodnight kisses. All things they would never share together. 

Yet, there was never a second of doubt. It would kill Eurydice. But Ophelia would thrive. She’d know springtime flowers, she’d know the first fall of snow. And, above all she would know her father. The only thing more Eurydice could want would be to be there, too. She wasn’t foolish and didn’t even entertain the idea. No use in wishing for what we cannot have.

The sun began to rise, signalling the start of a new day. A new season. A new life for Ophelia and her both. 

Eurydice didn’t move. Didn’t go to get dressed. Didn’t wake her daughter.  _ Let her stay in your arms just a little longer. Let her hold your finger. Let her be your baby.  _ She gave her a sad, heartbroken smile as tucked her closer to her skin. 

“You won’t remember me, but I promise I will never forget you, my love.”

**Author's Note:**

> Requests and Screaming can be received at superfuckingextra.tumblr.com


End file.
